Almost 2 Years Now..

2 years have nearly passed and not a day goes by that I don't think of the time I spent in New Zealand. I miss the people there so dearly, they've became a bigger part of my life than I think they realize.

Talking about my time there with others just boggles my mind, how do you explain a different world to someone who only knows their own? I find myself seeking out company who know of a world outside of our American bubble of celebrities, football games, and "bigger is better" attitude.
I've met many lovely people and shared a cuppa with them. We've discussed our loves for the places we've gone and the people there. As the conversation winds to an end, I can't help but feel a sick feeling in my stomach that reminds me that it's back to the real world of school, books, quizzes, midterms and tests.

New Zealand seems to take over a majority of my dreams as well... it's almost soothing to be back there even for a little while if only in my subconscious.

Till next time New Zealand, my hearts lies with you.

Life Lessons of New Zealand

When I left NZ Aunty jill said I will probably never really realize
how much of an impact my time overseas has had till I'm much older.

This is very true but I do intend on sharing with all of you the
lessons I learn in the meantime.

Every single human being is wonderfully and fearfully made by God.
Like snowflakes no two people are alike. We all learn, talk, and see
things differently. I like to gather as much information I possibly
can about someone or something so I can create an acurate evaluation
of it. I do this with everything, the world, my friends, school
subjects, and even God. As I'm
sure you can imagine my way gets in the way alot of the time, it's
impossible to know everything about something and sometimes this
little fact escapes my mind. I've lived my whole life putting things
in neat and organized boxes and what I'm realizing is that in doing
so, in believing I know all there is to know, I'm actually limiting
myself. I'm actually putting restrictions on everything and if it
doesn't fit in my little box it's thrown out or ignored in my case.

A lot of the restrictions are created from past experiences, which
isn't fair for those in my future or present. For instance, I haven't
had the most reliable group of best friends in my past. To make a long
story short best friends are like chapters in my life, numerous and
ranging length in their existence. So, when I became really close with
a girl from show choir, I guarded myself a lot. I refused to call her
my best friend and didn't want to let her in. Eventually one night she
texted me reminding me that ages not any of those girls and I needed
to trust her. I did and till this day she's my best friend. But
because my friend doesn't fit the descriptions of my friends in the
past I tend to always resort back to my fear of losing a best friend
all over again. While in nz we talked every single day and still when
I returned from nz I was still afraid of losing such a great
friendship. I wasn't trusting her because my friends in the past were
trustworthy. But all along she was there reminding me that I could
trust her, she didn't walk away when it would be easiest she stayed
and refused to fit the restrictions of my friends before.

I was limiting my life experiences because I was allowing my past to
control my present and future. Your past isn't bad to look at
sometimes it keeps you from making horrible mistakes all over again
but other finds it keeps you from experiencing some of the most pure
things in life.

Get rid if your boxes there is no room for them in this round world.

a.

My deepest apologies, I'm home.

My deepest apologies to anyone who has been checking this site in
search or news of my arrival back home, I'm here safe and sound.

After traveling with 3 different planes, between 2 different
countries, I for 1 am glad there is no more traveling in my extremely
close future.

My arrival back home was greeted by my very anxious mother, father,
sister, uncle, and grandmother, all of which I was very happy to see.
A familiar face while traveling is like chocolate to an emotional
woman. I'm guessing I don't have to explain that one! :)

I'm glad to be back, although, I miss my time in nz quite a lot,
especially the people.

Since my debut back into Indiana I have been catching up with family
and friends and also attempting to adjust back into the American way
of life, which is more difficult than I had ever imagined. This is
home, home shouldn't have to take time to get used to, but it does.
For three months new zealand was my home, I ate, drank, and slept new
zealand so to be emerged so personally back into what was back then a
familiar thing is quite trying. American ways are much different from
a kiwis.

I know through my experiences I have changed and grown and I am
struggling with finding how that effects my past relationships. This
is what you would technically call culture shock. And it's a little
embarassing to be experiencing it here and not when I was in new
zealand.

I will continue to use this blog as I discover and uncover more of the
effects my time over seas has had on me.

Until next, I wish you all a happy mothers day.

Much love,
a.

Anzac Weekend

Friday morning I woke up two whispering aunties who seemed to be just waiting on my entry to consciousness. They reminded me of little girls at a sleep over. We had brought food for meals and I enjoyed a nice hot bowl of oats while I read my book. I was explained later on that this week was supposed to be a sort of debriefing time for my trip. (it sounds intimidating to me...) We sat around the lounge of the stay and read 2 Corinthians 5 and discussed our different views on the scriptures. Each of us had a different translation therefore had different things to say about it. It's rather interesting how words can take on so many meanings. Aunty Jane had a few meetings with clients to attend to and would be heading back east for awhile so, Aunty Jill and I grabbed a ride with her down to the beach. The beaches on the east side are tame, small, calm... west side beaches are surf beaches, rugged, untamed,and huge waves that splashed up on the rocks like an explosion. The weather turned from rainy to a beautiful sunny day and we enjoyed every second of it. I climbed up the various rocks along the water trying to find ocean life among the rocks. Starfish clung to the undersides of rocks and clams covered the top sides. When the tide went out new rock were exposed to climbing but when the tide came back in you were in trouble. I found that out the hard way! I beach was absolutely amazing a pure and most beautiful display of God's power and love for his children. Aunty Jill and I took heaps of pictures and I must say, some of them are pretty darn good! True beauty can not be capture though, it can only be enjoyed.
A small grumble came from my tummy and I knew it was time for my favorite meal, fish and chips on the beach! A few sparrows gathered at our feet and we threw bits of chips their way. We finished up as soon as we could, the blustery wind made a relaxed lunch nearly impossible. We started walking back to the beachstay and stopped off for an ice cream and threw chips at some ducks, sparrows, and seagulls. The walk back was nice but I wasn't feeling too well and rested when we got back. I worked on some of the memory verses I was assigned and Aunty Jill built a fire. Aunty Jane and Sonia joined us for some dinner, and games later on. The Aunties has prepared a little project for me, they bought beads for me to make some prayer beads. Each one I got to pick out for the different areas I'd be praying for. One for my mom, dad, and sister, best friend.. and so on. I like it tons and keep it with me as much as I can now. At the bottom of my beads is a heart bead to let me know I'm loved. I really appreciated this!!! Aunty Jane asked me questions about how things have changed since I left the States both here and there, I hadn't thought of things changing too much, I guess I just liked thinking that, that part of the world just froze in my absense. We ate and sat around the fire enjoying each others company. Cheeky phrases being thrown from one side of the fire to the other and laughs surrounding us all. A sense of happiness filled the room and each of us were just enjoying the community. That night I slept super well knowing that all was right and good.

The next day I woke up and it was Anzac Day which is a national day of remembrance in Australia and New Zealand, and is commemorated by both countries on 25 April every year to honour members of the Australian and New Zealand Army Corps (ANZAC) who fought at Gallipoli in Turkey during World War I. It now more broadly commemorates all those who died and served in military operations for the country. We ate eggs and toast for breakfast and packed up our suitcases and packed the car. Geocahing was on their minds and I had no say in it, I tagged along and climbed with them to a lookout over Piha beach. It was amazing. A parade was held and we drove down to see it, the parade leads to Lion Rock where the ceremony is held. They sang "God Save New Zealand" their anthem and paid tribute to the soldiers. It was a nice ceremony, very laid back and casual, very unlike things in the states. After the people dispersed we began our climb up Lion Rock. The first bit of the climb is difficult and involves a rope past a certain point stairs make the climb much easier. New Zealand hold some of the most amazing sights to be seen by the human eye. This was one of them. Lunch back at the beachstay and a nice drive to the city for dinner. We ate at a restaurant called the "Mexican Cafe", New Zealand is some great distance from Mexico therefore it was nothing like good ol' Real Ha but still very enjoyable. Different friends joined us for the night, community is such a beautiful thing.
Saying I slept amazing that night would be an understatement.

Heading up to Piha

I could start making excuses of all the reasons I'm behind on blogging like I'm sick, injured, was out of town, and have been really busy.. but you don't want to hear all of those! :)

Tuesday
I spent the day at Shore Hub answering phones and directing calls while working on blogs and the youth bulletin. Days go by pretty fast at the hub, different leaders of the church stop and talk to me and there are always other chores to do around the place. One of the youth and I were planning to meet up but things didn't work out as planned so I ended up going to meet her in her neck of the woods. We met at McDonald's for some grub and then headed over to the mall to walk off the millions of calories that I had just eaten. Our talks range from important to off hand comments really easily which is nice because it never feels forced. Being able to walk around made things alot of fun and we found adventure in each store we wandered into. The malls closed though, and we realized that we had some how been over looked by security guards and were some of the last ones in the mall, we laughed as we made a break for the exits. There isn't much to do on a weekday so we headed back over to the McDonald's for an apple pie and continued our discussion. 5 hours I spent with the girl and every minute of it a blast and a suprise. Sometimes all people need is a person to talk to and to relate with.

Wednesday
I slept in and worked on stuff here in the house, youth bulletin, journalling the usual, also trying to finish up all the reading I was assigned. Inside days aren't terribly exciting and there are no amazing things to decribe. So yes, an inside day for me, they are terribly needed but nothing to write home about!

Thursday
I went back to the hub and continued answering phones and forwarding calls. Usually I'd be with Jill Nerheny but she didn't have anything for me to do this week and ANZAC Day was coming up so she allowed me the week for other things. It was just us girls at the Hub, Belinda the youth minister, Maxine the children's minister, Me.. the volunteer? haha. When we all got tired and I bit ran down we called for a "Tea Time" with Tim Tams. Tim Tams are these amazing chocolate covered cookies that melt in your mouth. Amazing discussions pop up when people are at peace, I suppose that's the art of hospitality. Aunty Jill picked me up from the hub and we headed over to Massey University for a kebab and to tie up some loose ends before leaving for the weekend. The kebab was amazing as usual and we headed back home to meet up with Aunty Jane. We packed the car with suitcases, food, and pillows and headed out to Piha. Piha is the most popular surf beach in New Zealand. I'm no surfer so don't expect to see a picture of me hanging ten. I'm slowly but surely getting used to the roads but still after 10 turns in a row around a mountain side my stomach is in my throat and it's contents are not happy. The Beachstay that we stayed at was warm and cozy with a big fire place and cushy couches. We had stopped on the way over for some groceries and pies for dinner. We sat down at one of the tables in the stay in enjoyed our pies. (pies here don't mean like pumpkin, apple, lemon, or any other favorite. they usually mean meat pies) It was still early in the night so we played some games something called "pass the pig" and boggle. I was dead tired from the travel and I hit that bunkbead pretty hard, but rolled over to read a few chapters in my book "Blue like Jazz" it's an amazing book with a nonchristian outlook on christianity. It's really enjoyable. The writer refers to spirituality like one can explain being hungry or thirsty, it's there you feel it, but it's nearly unexplainable. You just know it and you do what the feeling tells you to!

Sunday the day of Doctor Prescribed Rest

This is my second to last Sunday morning service at Shore Community Christian Church. I remember my very first Sunday there. I clung pretty tightly to Aunty Jill, every face was so... unfamiliar. It was almost like I had "NEW COMER" written somewhere on my forehead. There wasn't much organization and getting through the crowds of people was difficult especially when your goal is to not bring attention to yourself. Now I'm able to walk through the doors with my head held high and greet each person and hey bid me good morning. It's a good feeling to know that you are memorable. To know that when you walk into a room people actually seek you out to talk to you instead of being the person who hides along the wall hoping to leave as soon as possible.I sat with the youth girls and organized a MovieLunch at the house for the following Sunday.

It was raining or we all would have gone to Torbay so I could rock climb, instead we headed to the city for some geocaching and kebabs. (I was much more excited about the kebabs, but I enjoy the climbing and hiking the geocaching brings) One of the caches we went after was called "Lost Park" and the GPS led me to a graveyard. Aunty Jill and Sonia always put me in charge of the GPS because it gives me something to do and I don't talk nearly as much as I would. I could only imagine the look on my face when they said we'd be going through the graveyard... I don't do dead things. Through the graveyard we went, the tombs were old, cracked, sinking, and all together the creapiest looking. It was as if Disney World had tested out their graveyard scene for Haunted Mansion here or something. The arrow on the GPS pointed north but I had run out of flat north bound land, we'd be going down hill. My NIKEs weren't made for loose gravel, leaves, sticks, and dirt, I clung to every single branch, limb, tree, shrub, and blade of grass I could until they found the cache and replaced it back to it's resting spot. I was planning on taking one for the team and heading back up the hill to pull everyone up but Aunty Jill thought going farther down the hill would be more of an adventure, we didn't argue.
Keep in mind the only stationary thing on this particular hillside was the hill itself. Each of us took a different approach to the downhill decent, aunty jane went backwards on her hands and feet, Aunty Jill seemed to just glide down (I don't think the woman has a clumsy bone in her body), I crouched down and used my feet as skies and my hands as oars.. it worked and I was going great until I realized nothing was wearing me and I was heading toward a giant pile of debri from the palm trees, it stopped me. If you've ever studied physics Newton's 1st Law states:An object at rest tends to stay at rest and an object in motion tends to stay in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force. My feet were stopped by the debri but nothing stopped my upper body, and I was set onto my knees almost eating dirt. Ofcourse this would feel good but there was an extra pain that I had not expected, a 6" spike was sticking out of my knee. I had seen in a few different nature shows that nature should never be left in wounds.. so I pulled it out.. and it bled. Aunty Jane being the mother that she is pulled out a plaster and bandaged me up and took a picture of my boo-boo to make me feel better. Out of the woods, through the cemetery, and on to more caching. My knee hurt througout the day but I didn't think much of it. Aunty Jill told me stories of how palm spikes contain toxins and it was the poisons that hurt.. I laughed. When we got home my knee still hurt and I thought maybe it was my jeans rubbing against the plaster so I changed into shorts, I took one look at my knee and knew this wasn't going to be good. I walked into the kitched and stuck my foot up on a chair near Aunty Jill "umm.. I think I know why it is still hurting" I had another spike in my knee, a considerably smaller one but deeper in my knee. She pointed out one that I had another little friend that was hiding. Aunty Jill removed the larger one with tweasers but couldn't get the other one out. It hurt, worse than when my wrist broke, I didn't scream instead I just bit down on my teeth. This wasn't going to be good, off to the Accident & Emergency Center.
The center wasn't too bad, the people were nice and I didn't have to wait long at all. The doctor injected my knee with some local anestetic, the needle was huge and the second I saw it my head hit the pillow. I cried, I admit it, I bawled... not just then but earlier on too. The doctor was German and I told her all the german I knew from my foreign exchange student. I think she enjoyed my butchering of her language. A small incision was made in my knee and out came the poisonous spike and the debri in the others too. Thank goodness I felt nothing. I got bandaged up and was told to rest it, no lunges, squats, going to the gym, cross-country running or any of the things I do all the time.. oh wait.. that wasn't me.. I've got to stop watching fitness shows.

Monday I read and took care of my knee, it was sore and stiff when I woke up. I cleaned the house just in time for lifegroup to be cancelled due to small numbers and just became one with the couch for the rest of the day. Knee Injuries are no fun, you bend it, it hurts, you straigten it, it hurts. Well atleast I can over exaggerate the story into some awesome action comic and have a cool scar!

May you never fall in a cemetery...

The Whale & Jonah

Saturday morning I awoke feeling as though a giant truck had lept from the road traveled up the stairs and through my bedroom door and hit me! Every so often exhaustion seeps into my system and unfortunately there isn't much I can ever do about it. It wasn't too suprising that hours later I was waking up again to realize my tummy was growling and Aunty Jill & Aunty Jane were still out at a wedding.
They came home later than evening and so did Sonia. I think Sonia has been over almost every single day since I've been here, which is great I'm quite keen to have her around!
Jill works with Refugee Resettlement and I have gone along with her on various trips to see the Conganese ladies she is presently working with. Tonight Omerance & Grace were cooking all four of us dinner, a traditional African dinner that is. I've traveled many places with my family, (europe, mexico, and canada mostly)and every time you eat in a different place it's like learning to feed yourself all over again. Each culture comes with it's onwn dining etiquette, styles of foods, textures, and tastes. Now, the African dinner was absolutely lovely, fish, cabbage, rice, chips, coleslaw, and a few other items that I either don't remember or would completely butcher the name of, but I realized just how spoiled I am when I was gazing over my more than generous plate and was picking out what I should eat quicker as not to obsorb the taste and what looked safe enough to savor.
Beach whales come to the sand because their echolocation malfunctions, they stay there unable to free themselves because they are out of their everyday surrounding. They now have to learn to adapt to the oxygen in the air and the cruel gravity of the earth instead of their naturally wet and buoyant atmosphere. Like a beached whale I was out of my norm and didn't know what to do. I knew that I had to literally "try" everything and eat as much as possible to avoid insulting my wonderful cooks. My stomached seemed to handle things quite well and the Carrot cake that we had brought with us was just the treat I wanted.
I guess it just goes to show that we have everything we need to adapt to new situations and enviroments but because we allow ourselves to first "freak out" and hypervenilate and then give up hope, like the whales on the beaches, we only set ourselves up for failure.
This isn't just true in dining circumstances, coming to New Zealand I was really excited I knew things would be different, but I was willing to accept any changes that came at me. The night before leaving Indianapolis my best friend and I were talking and I began to allow my head to overthink (which is a constant problem with us hyper people). I began to worry about the things that I couldn't control the things that were bigger than me, the very things that earlier on were ok and would just be accepted. I allowed myself to lose faith in myself and setting myself up for a beach funeral. I haven't gained any certain skill that has made adapting to my new enviroment easier, I haven't grown gills or an extended neck, I have simply used the skills that I have. I had the solution to all my worries right inside me.

How many times do we overreact and put ourselves out of the game just because we don't believe in ourselves.

Jonah didn't want to go to Ninevah, I personally think he didn't think he had it in him to change such a corrupt place. God believed in him though and made sure that Jonah got the chance to see it in himself.

We are more than We think We are, We are capable of more than We ever dreamed, and only We can stop Ourselves from doing the unthinkable.